I don't always give my best.
Sometimes 'my best' is too much work and I settle for doing 'just enough' or even 'maybe later'. I'll go to bed with that sink-full of dishes and toppling pile of laundry, with no idea what's for breakfast and with a lovely, crumb-crusted floor.
Once or twice, I've even fallen into bed fully clothed and with un-brushed teeth. Sorry, honey.
I just thought a little confession would be good.
Someone called and told how guilty she felt for going back to bed that morning. She thought about all the things I had probably already accomplished that day, and what a loser she was for snuggling back in.
Funny thing is, I often have the same thoughts about her.
So many times in my day I think she could have done this faster or better. She probably always knows where things are, and how embarrassed I 'd be if she opened this cupboard or looked in this shower.
And it's not just one person, it's every other woman out there.
I am forever comparing myself. But I always seem to compare my worst with their best.
If only I could take the best of everyone and combine them into one, like some Suzy Homemaker on steroids.
As though someone really does have it all together, all the time.
You know that those pictures are staged, right?
We take pictures because we want to remember that one time, we did make a beautiful meal for our family and everyone liked it. Or we want to remember that we do sometimes have fun together and everyone laughs.
Someone said jokingly, "It's not about having fun. It's about the pictures!".
But having it all together in real life is more illusive, more of a special occasion.
There are those days where everything clicks along, every meal is planned, the house is clean and I even see the bottom of the laundry baskets. School happens peacefully and the kids play a game together. My husband walks in to the smell of his favorite dinner, sits down to eat it with his favorite people, and we all have a lovely discussion that is relevant and fruitful.
The trouble is that I expect the days to always be that way. And what do expectations get me?
More often, those events don't all line up on the same day. Monday I might have all our meals planned. Tuesday school might go peacefully and the kids might play a game. Wednesday may be a marathon laundry day, and Thursday we might have a really good discussion at dinner with no bathroom noises, no 5th grade humor, and no fighting over who-sits-where.
But rarely does it all happen in one day. That would either be exhausting, or a waste of time, or The Cleavers. Surely there are better things to do than live in a photo shoot. Is a picture really worth a thousand words?
We live in the real world with real mess-ups and do-overs every morning, and I'm so thankful for that.
My heart's desire is to honor God and my husband, and that needs to be the driving force behind all I do or don't do in a day. They both know my weaknesses and love me anyway.
... walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; - {Col 1:10 NKJV}
Are you stuck comparing yourself with others? How do you guage your accomplishments - what makes you feel like you've done enough for the day?
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Counting all the gifts this week, some of them numbered here:
298. The full moon
299. The fog clearing away in the morning
300. Motivation!
301. Bailey, thanking me for making her do hard things
302. Bible discussions
303. good friends at the river
304. 3 things that were broken or lost, that are now found or fixed
